Humility

Humility is the quality or state of being humble, which is being lowly in mind, with a feeling of insignificance in one’s own eyes, having a humble opinion of one’s self.

 

Sometimes we may get the definition of something by looking at what it’s not. 

The opposite of humility is pride and arrogance. The definition of pride is, “a feeling of pleasure from one’s own achievements, delight or elation arising from some act, possession or relationship, a reasonable or justifiable self-respect, either in mind, speech or conduct.”

We may be quick to say that we are not proud, but again pride is always hideous. You cannot see pride in the mirror, and it’s hard to hear someone say they are proud. Some people, in pride, even boast about their "humility"! These are a few ways through which pride manifests itself: 

1. When someone is appreciated or recognized and you feel like you could do better than them, not seeing why they even got the recognition or appreciation in the first place. Pride is the root of covetousness, jealousy and envy.  Makes sense why Paul would liken covetousness to idolatry (Col. 3:5), as covetousness coupled with pride is basically worship of oneself.
   
2. When you are told to do something and will not do it as you think your way is always better, or unconsciously think that you should not be told, or just decide to go your own way. Pride is the root of rebellion, sin and disobedience. Below every surface of sin, is rebellion.
   
3. When you are corrected and feel offended, going to the extent of asking the other person who they think they are to “judge” you. Pride is always the root of a defensive mechanism in an individual.
   
4. When someone is speaking and you keep cutting them off, thinking you have better things to say, or won’t even pay attention to what they are saying as you rule off that what they have to say is not important. Humility says, "let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak..." Jas. 1:19.
   
5. When your conversations are always marked by “I “, always talking about yourself. Pride is the root of selfishness, and thus strife, divisions, feuds, arguments and fights (James 4:1-2).
   
6. When you always talk about others lowly, or think of others lowly; this leads to sometimes embarrassing them. E.g. the most common one, talking down to a bus conductor, watchman or waiter, or treating them harshly. Pride is the root of malice, contempt (looking down on others), and gossip.
   
7. When you cannot ask for help, always trying to solve things on your own even when it’s clear you need help, either physically or spiritually. Pride is the root of self-sufficiency, and in some cases, ignorance.
   
8. When you always want recognition, and do things to show off and for people to notice. When you get disappointed when you do not get noticed or recognized. Pride is the root of low self-esteem, since you are exalting your weaknesses, thinking highly of yourself more than you ought to (Rom. 12:3), in a negative way, and are inward focused. This happens when you always expect attention and recognition and when it does not come your way you start feeling bad and low.
   
9. When you always think you are right, and argue even when you know the other person is right, just so that you may not admit you are wrong. Proud people never admit they are wrong. When it is hard to say, “I was wrong”, “I am sorry”, "Thank you", there's pride beneath the surface. Pride is the root of arguments, broken relationships and divorces. 
   
10. When you cannot forgive or ask for forgiveness. Pride will never ask for forgiveness, or forgive others, as you think you are more important than anyone else that you cannot apologise. Pride will make you feel like you did not deserve what came your way, and because you are so important, anyone who wrongs you have done the worst mistake of their lives because they will never be forgiven by you. Pride is the root of bitterness and unforgiveness.
    
11. When you cannot do a certain task, because you think it is too “low” for you. When asked who will offer to for example wipe the church seats, clean dishes, wash people’s hands etc., you feel that it should be anyone else but you. Pride is the root of self-exaltation and contempt.
    
12. When you always worry about what people think about you (insecurity). Proud people can never be true worshipers, as they always worry about what people will think. Pride keeps people from accepting Christ. Humble people do not care what people think, as they know who they are and people’s opinions will never change their identity. Pride is the root of lies, pretense and hypocrisy, and cheating.
    
13. When you always expect to be given, and served. Innately you believe that you are more important and should always receive. Pride people are masters and takers, they can never be givers. Pride is the root of selfishness, dictatorship and bossiness.

If you've noticed one or two of these "symptoms" of pride in you, it doesn't help for you to take care of them, by addressing the individual actions. Bad fruit is always an indication of bad roots. This means that instead of focusing on the fruit (manifestations of pride), focus on the root (condition of heart and mind), and deal with it there. Long before pride is observed, it starts from the heart and mind. You start feeling “important” and puffed up (Rom. 12:3,16). As Christians we should never be associated with pride, knowing how much God hates pride:

Proverbs 16:5

"Everyone proud in heart is an abomination unto the Lord…" 

Proverbs 6:16-17. 

"These six things the Lord hates, Yes, seven are an abomination to Him: A proud look..” 

James 4:6

"God resists the proud, but gives grace to the humble."        

1 Peter 5:5 (AMP)

“For God sets Himself against the proud (the insolent, the overbearing, the disdainful, the presumptuous, the boastful) - [and He opposes, frustrates, and defeats them, but gives grace (favor, blessing) to the humble.” 

So, how can we be humble? By learning from Jesus!

Matthew 11:29

“Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.”

Matthew 11:29 (AMP)

“Take My yoke upon you and learn of Me, for I am gentle (meek) and humble (lowly) in heart, and you will find rest (relief and ease and refreshment and recreation and blessed quiet) for your souls.

From this verse, one of the rewards of humility is rest -- that blessed quietness. We can all attest to the fact that most proud people, especially the ones who believe in self-sufficiency, do not have rest. They are always looking for more, wanting more power, wealth, status, recognition etc. The humble are always at rest and are always contented. 

We have to understand and keep in mind that pride is of the devil, and is in his nature (Is. 14:12-14, Ez. 28:13-19). We used to bear his nature, before we accepted Christ. Now that we’re in Christ, we are new creations (2 Cor. 5:17). We bear the nature of God, and since God is humble, we are humble by nature. We have gentleness and meekness as fruit of the Spirit (Gal. 5:22-23). It therefore goes without saying that walking in pride is going and acting against our new nature. If we don’t know who we are, Whose we are and what we have in us, we’ll never act according to our new nature. The communication of our faith becomes effective by the acknowledgement of every good thing that is in us in Christ (Philemon 6). As we acknowledge the fact that we are humble by nature, and believe so with all our hearts, then it becomes easy for us to manifest humility. 

The Bible gives us the secrets to living in humility:

Philippians 2:3-4

“Let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem others better than himself. 4 Let each of you look out not only for his own interests, but also for the interests of others.” 

According to Paul, nothing should be done through selfish ambition, which is basically selfishness . We are wired and trained from the beginning to be selfish. From the time we were born, we cry out for attention and demand for things (milk, food, toys, etc.) The world revolves around us, and when we do not get what we want we fuss and cry. This is why when you take a piece of chocolate from a child they will whine and cry. A child who does not even now what they are doing will cry to get your chocolate, as he/ she believes everything good is supposed to be theirs. Same happens in a supermarket, when you’re doing shopping; a child wants any good thing. Worse still, we are taught that if it doesn’t benefit you, it’s not worth your time. This is why even today you hear such statements as, “I let go of so and so because hanisaidii.” You are taught that the world revolves around you, that it is “Everyone for himself and God for us all.” Everything we do is through selfish ambition, trying to benefit ourselves even if it means stepping on top of people’s heads and toes to get it. This is why we have so much strife and fights (James 4:1-2).

God’s kingdom is vice-versa. Paul introduces us to this world, by telling us to do NOTHING out of selfish ambition. Imagine what the world would be like if all Christians did nothing out of selfish ambition. He further tells us how this is possible, which is through lowliness of mind. It all starts in the mind. Pride (kujiskia) and selfishness starts in the mind, and thus humility will also start in the mind. Humility starts when you refuse to entertain thoughts of selfish-ambition, and be lowly in mind. This basically means that you do not esteem yourself higher than you ought to, and "esteem others better than yourself " (verse 3). The Amplified version says to "regard the others as better than and superior to [yourself] [thinking more highly of one another than you do of yourselves]."

 

Picture in your mind being in the presence of the President of the Republic of Kenya, having to spend the day with him. How would you behave? You would rise up when he walks in, open the door for him when you walk with him, serve him, talk to him kindly, always listen, taking every word in, valuing his words and opinions, pay full attention etc. Why? Because you believe in a sense that he is better than you. Now if this is how you treat people who are better than you, this is how you should be treating EVERYONE. Treating people better than yourself applies the “you first” principle, where that person always comes first. This is the attitude we are supposed to have. Now try to imagine if ALL Christians treated each other better than themselves. You don’t gossip someone who you know is better than yourself, argue with them, fight them, embarrass them etc. You treat them with respect, always listen, give them your full attention, love them, and basically apply the “you first” principle. Since our Father shows no partiality/favourism (Acts 10:34, Rom. 2:11, Eph. 6:9), we should also be show no partiality/favourism. I don’t mean we don’t respect people, but I’m saying we don’t treat some people as better than others, rather we learn to see people the way God sees them, and treat them as He treats them. Seeing all people as God sees them, and treating all of them as better than ourselves is how we get there. 

Next, Paul tells us to look out not only for our own interests, but also for the interests of others. If you have noticed, the things he’s telling us are supposed to help us to get our minds off ourselves. That is the goal. Paul is not telling you not to look out for your interests, but rather to also look out for the interests of others. This basically means that in all you do you should put other people in consideration, how your actions, words and behavior will affect them; how your decisions will affect them. This is not how we are trained in the world. The world operates by the “mind your own business” principle, where I’m always supposed to be minding my own business, even if it affects others. This is selfishness. We are supposed to look out for the interests of others at all times. How much time do you spend looking out for the interests of others? How many times do you “make” or “create” time to help out another person? How many times do you sacrifice your money and time for another? How many times do you consider others before speaking, acting or making a decision? This is one of the greatest signs of humility, and the number one way to kill pride.

To be continued...

    Sam Gitonga

 Sunday Service Teaching, Transformation Ministry, Ruiru. 


Brother Sam is the Youth Leader at Teaching Transformation Ministry. We are located along the Thika-Ruai Flyover Junction (at the Thika Rd./ Bypass intersection), Next to Eastgate Restaurant.